Unfortunately, there are so many people who will never be able to just “clear mental/subconscious blockages and beliefs”, because they cannot process the language and motivation, some conditions require real help.
Trauma affects people in VERY complex and unique or different if you like, ways. Sometimes, trauma responses are obvious, but ugh, sometimes they manifest in more subtle behaviors, thoughts, and emotional patterns and you never know what’s coming next! Or are you really guilty of something you did or said. Language is the trickiest part.
Understanding how to recognize trauma and trauma-based behaviors is the first step, but to find your own way to the path to healing… can take years. I’m best case. Most people actually never step on that path.
These are some main signs and behaviors that I look for and that may point to trauma. Based on science and research and trauma-informed care principles from legal sources
️ Emotional Dysregulation
Trauma makes emotional regulation and management super difficult or even impossible. Even the best patterns and mindsets will be disrupted.
Mood swings – rapid changes in mood without a clear cause.
Emotional numbness – disconnection from feelings, as a self-protective mechanism.
Increased irritability or anger – frequent frustration or outbursts, especially when feeling overwhelmed or triggered.
Difficulty managing stress – tendency to become easily overwhelmed by everyday challenges or responsibilities.
Hyperarousal – often feeling on edge, constantly vigilant, or jumpy.
️ Avoidance Behaviors
To cope with painful memories or emotions, people with trauma often engage in avoidance, which can manifest in gazillion ways.
Avoiding reminders of the trauma – this might include specific places, people, or activities that trigger memories of the traumatic event.
Emotional withdrawal – isolating yourself from friends, family, or social activities to avoid vulnerability or potential triggers.
Substance abuse or addictive behaviors – using alcohol, drugs, or other substances to numb emotional pain or avoid confronting difficult feelings.
Procrastination or avoiding responsibilities – difficulty starting or finishing tasks due to fear of failure or feeling overwhelmed.
️ Hypervigilance and Anxiety
Many trauma warriors and survivors remain in a state of heightened awareness, constantly scanning their environment for danger. This is rooted in the brain’s survival response.
Excessive worry – constantly anticipating worst-case scenarios or feeling as though something bad is always about to happen.
Trouble sleeping – difficulty falling or staying asleep, often due to racing thoughts or nightmares.
Startle responses – overreacting to sudden noises, movements, or surprises.
Difficulty concentrating – trauma can make it challenging to focus or stay present, as the brain is preoccupied with potential threats or unresolved fears.
️ Relationship Challenges
Of course that trauma often deeply affects how people relate to others, especially in close and romantic relationships.
Fear of intimacy and vulnerability – hesitation or discomfort in forming deep emotional connections.
People-pleasing – constantly trying to please others to avoid conflict or rejection, often at the expense of their own needs.
Trust issues – difficulty trusting others, even those close to them, due to past betrayals or experiences of harm.
Emotional detachment – feeling distant or disconnected from loved ones, as if there’s a barrier between them and the world.
Clinging or dependency – fear of abandonment may lead to excessive dependency on a partner or friend for emotional safety.
️ Physical Symptoms
The imprint of trauma stays in the body. Even when the mind suppresses or tries to avoid it. Trauma can have very unpleasant and intense physical manifestations.
Chronic pain or illness – persistent pain, tension, or unexplained physical symptoms (headaches, stomachaches, etc.) can sometimes be traced back to unresolved trauma.
Gastrointestinal issues – trauma and stress can contribute to digestive problems like irritable bowel syndrome (IBS) or ulcers.
Fatigue – feeling constantly drained, even after rest, as the body is in a perpetual state of fight-or-flight.
Breathing issues – shortness of breath or hyperventilation, especially during anxiety-provoking situations.
Dissociation – feeling “outside” your body or disconnected from reality, often as a result of overwhelming stress.
️ Intrusive Thoughts and Flashbacks
Trauma warriors and survivors may experience constant and very vivid intrusive memories of the traumatic event that can feel overwhelming and are uncontrollable in the beginning.
Flashbacks – reliving the trauma as though it’s happening in the present moment, often triggered by sensory cues (sounds, smells, sights).
Nightmares – recurrent dreams about the traumatic event or dreams that evoke similar feelings of fear, helplessness, or horror.
Intrusive memories – unwanted and distressing memories that pop up without warning, causing emotional pain.
Ruminating on the past – constantly replaying the traumatic event or thinking about what could have been done differently.
️ Self-Destructive Behaviors
Trauma can lead people to engage in surprisingly harmful behaviors, often as a way to cope with or numb their emotional pain:
Self-harm – deliberate actions like cu**ing, bu*ning, or hi**ing oneself to manage overwhelming emotions.
Risky behaviors – engaging in dangerous activities such as reckless driving, unprotected sex, or substance abuse.
Disordered eating – using food (either through overeating or undereating) as a means of control or emotional regulation.
Neglecting personal care – lack of interest in hygiene, appearance, or health due to emotional exhaustion or a sense of hopelessness.
️ Identity and Self-Esteem Issues
Trauma often deeply impacts a person’s sense of self-worth and identity… it can totally change you.
Low self-esteem – feeling unworthy, unlovable, or inadequate is often result of trauma.
Identity confusion – struggling to define who you are outside of your traumatic experience.
Guilt and shame – carrying a sense of responsibility for the trauma or believing they deserved what happened.
Imposter syndrome – feeling like a fraud or fearing that others will discover they aren’t as competent or confident as they appear.
Perfectionism – overcompensating for feelings of inadequacy by striving for perfection in everything they do.
️ Trauma re-enactment
Trauma warriors and survivors may unconsciously seek to recreate their trauma in new situations as a way to gain control over it.
Unhealthy relationships – entering abusive or toxic relationships that mirror the dynamics of the original trauma.
Self-sabotage – undermining their own success or happiness or financial situation because it feels unfamiliar or undeserved.
Risk-taking – engaging in dangerous behaviors to re-experience the adrenaline or emotions linked to the trauma.
The most important word in treating trauma is CARE. For both both individuals and professionals. Recognising trauma – based patterns. And then promoting healthy ones. Because many other forms of therapy can produce something that we call re-traumatization. Nobody wants that.
So how does that look like?
My personal holy trinity:
☀️ Validation – Trauma survivors need to feel heard and understood. If you can validate somebody’s experiences without judgment that’s a great first step toward healing.
☀️ Safety – if you can provide emotional and psychological and physical safety in therapy and relationships, it can be literally critical for survivors to feel secure enough to start opening up and processing their trauma.
☀️ Empowerment – survivors should be given tools and strategies to regain control over their lives immediately. Help them by educating their emotions! And then behaviors will take care of the sense of empowerment and that encourages people to seek autonomy, which is the biggest marker of healing.
People are desperately lonely and need good humans who give a f*. Keep that in mind always.
Trauma is complex, but healing is possible. With the right support and deep understanding and unconditional acceptance and care.
Break the cycle. Move forward. Follow the signal above the noise ☀️
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***I adapted these bullet points for this post, amd I used books and notes from my studies, but for real trauma education or therapy, you absolutely must consult a licenced therapist in your country.
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